I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
i can't believe i had my finger in that
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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