I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
