i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
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