Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
