im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Randomize
