There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
