I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
