She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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