Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
So vagazzling was a success
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
