i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Randomize
