their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Randomize
