I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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