We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
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