but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize