I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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