He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
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