Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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