no, he came in my armpit
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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