dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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