She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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