Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
