I wish I only lived at night.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize