Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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