I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Randomize
