He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize