Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
