What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
My life is pants optional.
Randomize