i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
