I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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