All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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