So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
