My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
