I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
