I bet he comes in French.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
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