1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Randomize
