I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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