How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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