I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
