Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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