going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
