ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
