and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
