I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I need to wash the frat house off of me
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
