My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
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