ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
He felt like a one man threesome
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
