i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
I just found a bag of teeth...
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
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