I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
