so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
