I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Never underestimate the power of titties
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