That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
